Survivor.

I woke up this morning and decided to cook all of you breakfast.  That makes me mad!  So because I decided on my own to do a nice thing and cook all of you breakfast…and it made me mad, I’m taking these Crunch Berries and hiding them.  That’ll teach you to let me do something nice for you.

What the hell is wrong with this Naonka person?  I’ve made it a point to try and not write too much about her so as to not give her ignorance my time.  I also wish that the sports media would just stop asking Terrell Owens and Brett Favre for their opinions, but I doubt either will happen.  Initially I thought she was just trolling for fame by being the rude reality star, now I think it’s something else.  I have no idea what, I’m no doctor.  What do you think, Purple Kelly? (silence)

Bread!  Rum!  Feast!  “We gotta drink all of this…today!”  Right on, Fabio.  Who amongst us hasn’t had days like that where all of the booze just needed to be dealt with, no matter what the consequences.  Back in my 20’s, we called that Saturday.

One thing I never did in my 20’s, or my 30’s,  was P90X.  Apparently Jane has and it seems to be serving her well.

Wanna know what you're playin' for?

Although, for the immunity challenge I’m pretty certain that a Shake Weight may have served as just as good of a training tool.  It looked like it was all forearms and deltoids being worked out in that challenge, that screams Shake Weight to me.  Shake Weight!  Right before the challenge, I asked Her Sweetness, “What’s the over/under on Dan lasting?  Three minutes?”  Then he was out.  That rod is probably heavier than I think. (That’s what she said)

Anyone else tired of hearing Marty blabber on?  I do like what his hair has become, but I’m Marty-saturated.  Dan has nothing to say?  Holly?  Purple Kelly, what about you? (silence)

I do know this, Benry needs to form an alliance with Marty right now.  Bring in Fabio and maybe Holly (make sure you get her South Dakota Word of Honor), then shut up about it.  Otherwise you all become a group of swing votes, why not merge your swingvotedness and dominate?

Anyway, see ya Alina.  Whatever.  Nice try at making a plan out of nowhere with a group of people that didn’t like you.  Nice awareness.

Survivor Freeze Frame of the Week: I call this one “Not Quite Eve”.

 

Advertisements

One response to “Survivor.

  1. Awesome column !! Read it twice. Didn’t Marty look like the smile hair guy that was tailgating ?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s