All in.

Desperate times, desperate measures.  From a fantasy football sense starting 1-4 qualifies as desperate times for me.  Now, I’m not an ignorant jackass and I realize that it’s just fantasy football.  War, Cancer, being a miner, my own unemployment, these are real problems, I know the difference.  I think I just need to tell myself that because I’m writing a blog about a game that involves me getting mad and ranting when some well paid athlete that I probably wouldn’t like can’t keep Randy Moss out of the end zone.  Or maybe I’m just telling myself that there are more important things in life, because I’m losing and trying to lessen the sting of defeat. With that said, let’s get down to fixing this 1-4 team.  I’ll begin by telling you that at 1:00 last Sunday I burned some sage in the hopes of getting the evil out of the house.  It is said that burning sage can rid your house of the badness.  Doing this in the hopes of winning a fantasy football game is undoubtedly under the same umbrella as praying to win the lottery, but praying doesn’t smell as nice.

 

You're laying in Mike Williams' end zone, Lance.

 

So while I lost both games last week, the sage may have helped in the long run.  I had been fighting every week with whether to start Lance Moore or Mike Williams, and Mike Williams has made that decision easy from here on out.  It’s him. I’m probably the only owner in this league that makes trade offers every week, because I can’t just sit still, but it seems like I have a reputation of being a trade raper with people I’ve never even met.  There are a few owners that I haven’t made offers to, mainly because they’re winning or there’s just not a fit.  One owner, though, is in the midst of a three game losing streak after starting out 2-0.  There isn’t a lot of running back depth on their team with Matt Forte and Fred Jackson being their top two.  The back-up Saints backs, Ladell Betts and Chris Ivory are the only other two backs.  She dropped Beanie Wells last Saturday.  This team also has Andre Johnson and Reggie Wayne, and I have just about had it with this Greg Jennings I have that’s causing some irritation.  Oh, The Union changed it’s name by the way, we are now Roll Over, because that’s what we do.  Roll Over has some solid running back depth to trade.  Ahmad Bradshaw, the now ball touching Felix Jones, and Ben-Jarvis-Green-Ellis are taking up bench space behind Chris Johnson and Arian Foster.  I’d never play any of the 3 back-ups except on Foster or Johnson’s bye weeks.  I will often overpay in a trade if it gives me a solid starting line-up with no questions as to who I should play each week.  At 1-4, depth isn’t doing me any good anyway.  So I proposed giving up Bradshaw and Jennings for Johnson and her worst player (probably a Saints back).  This was Monday, on Tuesday morning the trade was still hanging out there when this owner sent an email to the league that she was looking to trade Tom Brady for a running back.  I have a running back, I’d like Tom Brady.  I sent an email to discuss some options, while waiting for a reply an email came that there was a trade, this same owner just acquired Hines Ward for Ladell Betts.  Huh? That seemed a little one-sided, but I was mostly wondering how it would effect my trade.  I figured it could only help because she just strengthened her receiving core.  Since she has a job and all the work that goes along with it, we really didn’t negotiate much until last night.

There was a point in these negotiations where I was going to get Brady/Johnson/Ivory or Mario Manningham for Garcon/F. Jones/Bradshaw.  Sure, I’ll take that.  That would have left me with Jennings and Mike Williams as my third and fourth receivers, but it would have left her with Wayne and Garcon, both on the same team.  I would have considered taking Wayne instead of Johnson, but this league has playoffs and there’s no guarantee that Reggie Wayne will be playing in week 17.  We settled on Brady/Johnson/Manningham for Jennings/F. Jones/Bradshaw. It’s a giant hit to Roll Over’s running back depth, but it gives us a  starting line-up that I can’t question every week, here’s our roster after the trade: Brady, Flacco Foster, C. Johnson, Green-Ellis R. White, A. Johnson, M. Williams, Garcon, L. Moore, Manningham Finley Folk, Saints Now, our league has a 2 day waiting period for trades to become official, which was going to hurt, because I wanted to drop Manningham and pick Beanie Wells before someone else did.

 

Heeeeeeeeaaaaaath!

 

I had put in to drop Matt Hasselbeck and pick up Heath Miller to cover Finley while he is out.  I was excited to see Miller buried on the free agent list, because if Rosinbagger loves one thing more than a girl with no self-esteem, it’s throwing touchdowns to Heath Miller.  I was even happier about this when this news broke.  As frustrating as that is, Finley became a dead roster spot and I could immediately drop him for Wells without having to wait for the trade to go through. Of course now I’m asking a lot of Heath Miller, but he’s at least had his bye and is coming off of a career year.  There are only two teams in the league that are carrying two tight ends so there isn’t much to be done in terms of a trade, but you should always be looking for ways to improve.  That’s some sage advice.

See what I did there?

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